Sometimes, I wonder about myself...

Today, walking out of Kong's house on my way to work, I saw a father come down stairs in his jammies to give his son the flute he forgot. I looked at my keys, and saw the one that I had darkened in marker to distinguish it from the other key, that looks exactly like it. I turned back to see what they were saying and then looked in the other direction towards where I was going. I didn't see anyone there and I was relieved. I don't like it when I see other people walking around me, they may have evil intentions or something... you never know in that neighborhood.
I passed a window near where the horse head thingies are and looked at myself in the mirror. I didn't like what I saw. I had just thrown on a t-shirt, covered by a light jacket and I had my trainers on. I don't like wearing them, but they are comfortable. Oh, well, fortunately no one will see me today...

I went through the chronicle parking lot, since it cuts the curve of the corner and I think its shorter, and walked up 5th Street. I wasn't really watching who was going by me, but a smartly dressed Asian girl caught my attention. She had really cute silver shoes on, with gaucho pants and a wife beater with a military jacket on top. I liked the look. Though I didn't think I could pull it off. Oh, well...

I noticed that the one coffee shop that I have always wanted to go in to had its window busted, and there really wasn't that long of a line at Starbucks today. But I was running a bit late and didn't have time to stop.

I went down the stairs into the Bart Station and pulled out my wallet on the way down. I looked at the broken ceramic mosaics done by kids that line the wall on the left hand side. I thought to myself that I really shouldn't have my wallet in my hand at this point, that perhaps I should wait until I reach the machine.

I got to the Ticket machine and pulled out my credit card. A person came up to me and said " excuse me..." to which I responded..."WHAT?"

He started asking me for money, giving me a story on how he needed to get to Pittsburg and that he had just gotten out of a mental hospital and that he had been trying to get the money together for a Bart ticket since 4 that morning. I told him that I was late and that I only had plastic and he seemed rather annoyed at me. Oh, well...

Once I got down the escalator, I walked over to the benches and sat down, and heard someone screaming profanities to themselves. All the other passengers were kind of looking around, a bit perplexed and uncomfortable, not knowing at all what to do.

And then it hit me...

Did I lock the front door?

The panic welled up inside of me. I couldn't remember. I remember the key, but the actual turn of it was lost to me. I couldn't go back. The train would be there in less than 6 minutes and it was the last train I could take without being late for work. There was no way.

I was almost positive that I did, but the more I thought about it, the more I was unsure.

I tried to forget about it, but I couldn't. The whole ride to work it was in the back of my head.
I just couldn't remember.

I had to tell Kong. There wasn't any way around it. And after I saw his email, I called.

All I wanted was a reassuring that, of course I had locked the door, of course I turned the lock while I was looking at the father give the boy his flute. But no, the knowledge made him drive all the way home from Mountain View to check.

And of course, I locked it.